this was written on 5 Nov

the crazy blogger is down again.. takes damn ultra long to load.. but guess what? i became smart... haha.. i decided to type my stuff onto notepad and cut n paste it when the darn thing's finished loading.. (which i doubt it will..)

well anyway.. 304 paper's over.. but that's not the topic for today..

i'm in a 'very tired but i refuse to sleep' mode now.. which is why im here.. and i guess that's almost all of the reason why i blog.. haha...

well... dunno if i've mentioned this before, but ever since my father's gone outta town, i've been sleeping in my mom's room.. meaning i sleep with someone beside me everyday... i was pretty reluctant at first.. cos i kinda like sleeping alone without disturbances.. and ya know.. even though my mom's bed is nice, big and comfy, her nagging is not.. sometimes if i kena scolding it'll follow all the way to bedtime.. but well.. that is also not the point now..

the point IS, my little cousins are here to stay today.. and my mom decided to have them sleep with her.. which means i'm now back in my own room.. ALONE.. Great, you might think... but no.. i'm kinda feeling weird having to sleep on my own now.. it feels.. lonely.. and kinda scary too.. im starting to understand why my mom wanted me to sleep with her now.. sleeping alone is a feeling that needs getting used to.. well.. everytime my dad comes home i feel like how i feel now.. but after the first day, i'm happy alone again..

but for my mom.. after some 20 years of sleeping with company, i guess it really requires time for adjustment.. and well.. one person on one big bed can get kinda scary if u can't sleep and ur thoughts run wild..

oh and guess what? i think the computer is a must-do routine if i wanna sleep in my room.. after typing for a couple of minutes, i'm now quite ok with the idea of sleeping here now.. i guess i need time to breathe in the air here and condition myself abit.. haha..

and msN if u're reading this now.. u know why i'm sitting so front even though my surname aint exactly a very early one?? that's because we're seated according to matric no!! i realised that after we all sat down and i was looking around.. and i was burning to tell u that.. and that thot jus popped up occasionally while i did the paper.. and also when they came to collect the papers.. but somehow when we were 'released' i jus forgot all abt it.. but ah.. i guess u'll prob haf realised this urself..

and i was watching terminator 3 jus now on tv.. and u know.. there's all that stuff about robots coming from the future.. and in a way the future couldn't be changed and judgment day couldn't be avoided... i think that's a damn interesting thing.. the thing about things from the future happening now.. it made me recall a scene in potter3.. where harry and hermione used the time twister or watever u call it thingy to go into the future.. so weird! it's like.. a something from the future comes into the present.. and in/directly causes certain things to happen now, which in turn leads to something that will happen in the future.. i'm like.. WHAT??

and when the thing in the future happens in the present, and that thing causes the future to happen, THEN.. that thing is also actually PART of the present isn't it?? because there is no way when we go from the future back to the present (or past for that matter..), we can do things to change the future.. cos well.. for us to come back from the future, the future HAS happened? and so if we change the current situation and change the future.. then the future as we know it now will not be existent.. it'll be something else! and if it was something else.. then how the hell did we get back into the present..

but well if that's the case, that we cannot change the future, then what the hell is the point of going back into the present then.. and then i'm reminded of the potter3 case again.. while u watch the movie, the stuff that happened in the present was actually happening due to interferences from the future.. which means that whatever that they were trying to avoid, or so called 'change', was avoided.. but i wouldn't say 'changed', because that thing never did happen in the first place..

ok freak this thing is getting kinda cyclical.. but basically i still can't get this future and present thing in logical structure.. can't reason it out! i guess this time travel thing CAN'T be figured out.. which is why it's still such a hot topic to use in sci-fi after DECADES..

and... bloody blogspot is really down!! can't post this today.. and i wrote so much!! i won't remember to post it tmr!! aargh.. i shld think about changing blog provider..

~ten minutes later~
i'm still getting the freaking internal server error.. and i was jus reading someone else's blog and i saw the words "go go go"..
which reminds me of what i've been doing for the past 2 weeks.. i've been watching this show (8pm ch55) called "mei3 li4 zai4 wang4" and there's this character in the show (played by guo jin4 an1) that keeps saying "go go go!"
it's a realli funny show.. and i'm beginning to like guo more and more! he's a damn gd actor! esp after watching gang4 fu1 cheng2 long2 (literally meaning goondu husband turns into dragon)..
and ok.. i must be nuts but i've kinda caught on the go go go bug.. it's quite fun doing the action actually.. basically it's jus pretending that ur both hands are guns (i.e. 3 fingers closed, index and thumb open), and then when u say go go go, ur hands go, point point point.. it's quite catchy realli!

yah.. so catch the show if u've got the time.. it's quite light.. good for relieving stress.. haha..

and it's time i go to bed...

*yawn*

go go go!