Another silly attempt to improve my English...

Well, as the heading suggests, I'm here because I was just reading a few other ppl's (oops... abbreviation again!!) blogs and realised that HEY! i should really start typing in proper English before I lose it..

But it's really tough... for one, I've already spotted one more mistake above.. I forgot to capitalise one of my 'I's.. Ugh.. and I'm now torn between the US and UK English.. should I -z- or -s- my verbs??

As I was typing some messages in my Nokia phone, I realise that alot of verbs are not in their dictionary if I use the UK form.. Weird isn't it? I thought Nokia was from Finland.. Oh and within these few seconds of typing, I kinda already decided to use 's' instead.. as I always do.. well, it's really easier to type 's' rather than 'z'.

And just to remind myself, I've got 2 presentations tomorrow! And somehow I just don't feel like sleeping.. but there's nothing left to do.. I've watched all that I wanted to on TV.. and I've read almost everything that I wanted to read on Flowerpod.. But the worst thing being that there's something wrong with the site and it doesn't allow me to post.. (And I'm like.. what's the point if I can't make myself heard? Terribly irritating especially when I really DO have something to say..)

In any case, I'm gonna be bringing damn alot of stuff to school tomorrow.. (and I also realise that typing 'tomorrow' is one helluva chore..)
First, I gotta bring my laptop for presentation.. which just means that I've gotta bring my adaptor, mouse and the super-bulky laptop bag too! I used to carry my laptop around like a book.. (umm.. or should I say.. like a notebook) hehe.. But apparently that was bad la.. exposes it to unnecessary shock... I guess this explains why I often hear weird sounds going on in my hard disk.. Ah well..
To move on, I've also gotta bring this whole STACK of econs notes to school.. to return them to miss veg.. And I'd better remember to zap them or I'd just have totally wasted all my effort lugging them to and fro..

Seriously speaking, I don't see any point in going for lessons anymore..
First tutorial tomorrow: Insurance
The tutor hasn't been doing much and there are no more presentations.. I have absolutely no inkling of what's gonna happen tomorrow.. (this will give me an excuse to arrive late, i hope)
2nd tutorial: Econs
No choice.. Gotta do presentation for this tomorrow.. think we're the last group.. but it seems to me that there is one more lesson for next week.. Which is like.. FOR WHAT?? ( I have to reiterate that I've been going for lessons for the past weeks only because I've got lessons BEFORE and AFTER it..)
3rd tut: SM
I absolutely abhor this subject.. as I might have also mentioned in my previous post today.. (Hmm.. I think I must be so bored that I keep posting here..)
And up till now I still DO NOT KNOW what I need to know for this subject.. Someone please help me! Oh.. and the reason why I go for tuts is coz I believe I might be able to find an answer to that question there.. But as you can see, after faithful attendance for the past semester, it hasn't done me any good..

I guess the only thing I can say is that my timetable really killed me.. TOo slack! Ah well.. So it's all my fault la!!

(I'm slowly slipping back into Singlish again.. no no! I must stop this!)

Okay I'm suddenly becoming popular.. I've got a couple of MSN messages coming in.. so... adieu for now!

exam depression

kowz i think i'm gonna suffer from depression soon! can't remember whether i mentioned this before, but the other day i when i thought of studying, my stomach just felt unwell.. then just now i was going to start studying SM and i just couldn't concentrate.. reading the words just made me felt like i wanna tear up the book..

well i guess this is partly cos i really DUN LIke this subject.. REALLY.. and reading it just makes me feel UGH.. and i was just so frustrated that i slammed the book on the table and threw my highlighter over it.. my mom thot i was throwing tantrums and gave me a lecture!! this is called huo bu dan xing!! i was feeling terrible enough having to try to read something i don't like, and there i've got my ears blasted with sounds i don't like too.. eek..

and i've absolutely no idea whats going on in SM.. it's like crap.. failed my case analysis the other time.. how to do well in the exams? and it doesnt seem like the textbook has enough stuff to teach me how to write a case.. and it doesn't help that i have a whopping 13 chapters to read.. so much for enjoying my last sem.. i'm just so afraid that i'll miss something out and end up not knowing something that would have been a pc of cake if i read my book.. which is why i cannot just abandon the textbook like that.. (i was really contemplating that)

and i do realise i don't know alot of simple concepts.. wat corporate-level strategy, diversification and what have u.. and dunno what.. differentiation at different levels.. wth!

tmr got the final 2 presentations.. hope i dun screw up to end up being hated by my grpmates.. sighz..

i'm hoping working life will be better...

sigh!

i know this is really crap.. but i cant help it!
i knew i had piano tmr.. but i still wasted damn alot of time today.. wanted to practise.. but i never could remember to do it..
and now i STIL haven't practised the new song that i goT LAST WEEK!
tmr i'm just so gonna be wasting my time there.. 20 mins.. jus sit there and try to fig out the score.. so pissed with myself..
and i suddenly realise i've got 2 presentations on friday which i havent totally prepared for.. wth..
ok.. i better write down a list toremind my self..

1. practise piano
2. read light of dawn
3. prepare for econs presentation
4. prepare for sm presentation (damn scared for this one cos my answers are just totally cut out from textbook)
   

itchy

i finally managed to figure out how to make my adobe print correctly.. but due to an overlook, i made the acrobat print 9 pages per page, while my printer setting was at 4 pages per page.. ended up i got 36 slides on ONE PAGE... words damn small.. but i'm not gonna waste my time/paper reprinting...

and as i wrote in pompom's blog.. im getting the itchy-but-cant-scratch feeling again! damn sick.. my forehead is feeling sorta uncomfortable.. but when i touch it i can feel it with my hands, but my forehead can hardly feel my hands.. and the itch feels like it's internal.. i read something about it before.. it's some kinda temporary condition.. but i can't remember what it is... someone pls enlighten me.. damn it.. it's a horrible feeling not to be able to feel urself.. worst thing is to have an itch that cannot be scratched.. argh... and i guess i have to attribute part of this to the fact that i now have a layer of dead skin over my face..

now for some medical tips.. this layer of dead skin is a natural reaction by the human body to protect it from future irritation.. ok duh.. u prob have figured that out.. now i'm waiting for tihs skin to peel off.. drop off.. wash off.. or whatever.. it's starting to turn into a dark color.. peel off liao will mei2 mei3... haha..

face log

sunday went kot

• applied sunsense on face..
• moderate sun exposure
• by the time i got home, face was already red and itchy
• dunno is it sun burnt

monday

• face swelled.. bro says look like pig.. and like i was holding 2 fishballs in my mouth
• no choice.. gotta see doc
• suspected photosensitivity, allergic to sunscreen
• went to see dr ong..
• 2nd in queue, but waited 1hr
• she said could be a combination of factors (what i gathered: bha already made my face v sensitive, then along with the sun exposure my face just couldn't take it, and even with a low percentage of chemical block, there was an adverse reaction)
• stuff she gave me:

1. ultrafine soothing cleansing lotion 118ml, $20
   
2. golden lipid drops 7.5ml, price unknown
3. skin repair cream 10g, $12
4. fucicort 5g, $7
5. tinted moisturiser spf15 10g, $12
6. medicated concealer 2.5g, $4.50
7. allergy medication, price unknown, name unknown (deltasilar or sth..)
   

total = $89

my face's a lot better today.. the swelling's gone down..
anw.. according to my research, i think i kena contact dermatitis.. yup..

reminder

1. this sunday can go try Dr Ong...
2. remember to call up to ask whether she's on duty
3. when tbs concealer finish liao can try niks medicated concealer
   

pain!!

wah lau my right cheek has a painful bump that is going to sprout tmr! wats with the bumps???!!!

sad case

after one week of nightly bha usage, my skin kena burnt...
after yesterday nite's of laying off bha, plus applying oxygen cream on my face.. much better liao
today also applied more oxygen cream on the cheeks.. yay.. healing..
but wah lau.. i need to do something!! cannot keep on going thru the stupid cycle of

acne --> clear --> dry --> skin repair --> and BACK to acne..

wat the h***

and finally convinced myself to see a derm.. but everyone's so busy..then gotta wait 2 weeks.. so in the meantime i wonder if i shld continue to self-treat, or go get differin from GP, or may be get retin-A.. then dunno need to get PC cleanser or not.. wah say.. damn confusing..

ok aside from this...

i think i'm developing work withdrawal symptoms..
today was gonna do my sm ppt.. had a terrible time.. wrote a few slides worth of crap then had to go tour agency liao.. luckily.. cos anw i was dying..

and now i'm actually supposed to continue with the slides.. but after like half an hour of wasting time, and going to the differin site to renew my confidence, i'm still not prepared to do it yet.. partly cos i dunno how to do! i can't come up with answers to teh question..
and jus now when i was watching tv, when i suddenly recall that i haf work to do later i just felt sick.. like really sick.. like stomach felt unwell.. (ok la.. i admit i ate a bit too much.. but really the work jus made me feel worse)

and i really just DONT FEEL LIKE doing the slides la! im staring at powerpoint and then dunno what to write.. and dunno how... and this stupid thing is less than 5% lor.. wah lau!

and i shld reiterate this.. i should go study cosmetology! i'll prob do a lot better and even do research willingly.. haha..

aargh i just duno how im gonna continue doing my sm la.. it's 11.20pm now.. i came into my room at around 10.20.. how how how.. i dun wanna sleep late! i already got v bad hei yan quan.. but i gotta fin this by today! tmr got more work to do... i hate powerpoint!

can't take sad scenes..

today at the crematorium everyone was just crying and crying like nobody's business.. esp dua-mm's sister.. she cried damn loudly while everyone was jus like quietly sobbing.. i really hate these crying scenes.. they just make me feel like crying even though i don't want to.. and regina, though for the past few days and she's been looking fine and only sobbing a bit from time to time, burst into tears (and pretty loudly) when dua-mm's coffin was gg to be burnt.. damn sad.. and then i saw dua-pek cry too.. cannot take it.. i totally din wanna cry but the tears just found their way outta my eyes.. ah well.. better not talk about this or i'm gonna wet my keyboard too..

anw.. gotta keep a constant log for my face..
so yesterday nite i used bha on whole face, bp on spots, moisturiser all over..
today was just plain za..
no significant changes.. well, at least now the face ain't that red n peeling.. but nonetheless v zitty.. dunno if the differin is working.. ah well.. wth..

tonite's prob gonna try the same thing as last nite.. if bha works fine, then i can give differin a miss liao... so mafan to hafta get a prescription for this thing.. and my parts of my forehead is damn itchy.. keep scratching.. dunno y..

and there were a few raised bumps on my left arm near the wrist yesterday.. today still got.. dunno where it came from either.. maybe the funeral place a bit dirty.. now it's still there but i think it's considerably flatter.. hope it'l go away soon..

hair stick

just bought a hair stick recently.. but damn disappointed! out of ten times that i try, i get like only one time right.. the hair just doesn't stay.. and when it does, it's terribly tight! and i feel like the stick is poking into my head.. arrgh..
but i guess the main reason is cos my stupid hair is not of uniform length.. sigh... now gotta wait damn long for the hair to grow out..

on 2nd thots..

i don't think bha + za is such a gd combi after all.. face is not so oily, but i think the dry patches are irritating me.. just kinda realised i've been having red and occasionally dry, itchy but basically unstable skin for the past month! that's like a damn long stabilizing period la!

i guess better stick with the oiliness of bha + neutro.. or use za plain.. hmm but then im beginning to think that za may be harmful with the alcohol in it.. sharks..

clearing up..

yesterday morning, tried bha with neutrogena..
let the bha dry before putting on moisturizer..
still somewhat sticky, and the face definitely is oilier than usual,
but now the irritation has roughly subsided, and the skin looks somewhat clearer liaoz..

hmm.. now i'm attributing the irritation to either
1) too much BP
2) exposure to sun (on sunday.. with BP)

ok.. yesterday night i did bha with differin, this morning the skin looks somewhat clearer.. but this might pose a bit of irritation.. after washing face, looks a bit red.. cheeks abit itchy (but maybe cos i put bp on cheeks yest evening)

this morning i did bha with za...
let the bha dry first too.. not bad.. skin not v oily.. think this may be a gd combi..
but there are still dry patches at the side of the cheeks..
gotta see how..

tonight dunno whether i shld put bha + differin or plain differin.. (scared over-irritation)

ah well..

jus a lil note for myself

started using differin around jan 28 '05..
wah say.. i think abt 6 weeks liao

breakout!

kow dunno why.. forehead is super cluttered..
dunno is it super purging or super irritated...
the rest of the face is kinda clearing up..
so the forehead..
is it too much bp??
or is it the bha?

..

okie..
this morning: bp all over + neutrogena
efx: not too bad! surprisingly.. face doesn't turn oily until after quite awhile..
can continue trying..
tonite's expt: bha + differin + neutrogena (see how)
then try bp + neutro again tmr..
:)

purging??

this morning:
bha + za
status: one zit on right cheek, plenty on chin area

evening:
moisture defense only

tonite:
status: as per morning, plus revival of zit on left cheek, plus one red bump near right nose
extractions + applied differin only

so wats the problem?
bha?
or moisturiser?

note: moisturiser only, absorbs quite well, moisturiser + bha: quite sticky

face log

Yesterday
nite: differin
morning: moisture defense only

--> not v gd.. think this mite clog face.. v oily.. try moisture defense with bha base

Today
nite: bha all over + differin
morn: za only..

--> za only mite be clogging too.. also.. mite be too dry.. flaking on cheeks

Tonight's plan: differin. tmr --> bha plus za